Transitional Kindergarten? To TK or not to TK?

Making educational decisions for my daughter is tough stuff.  It wouldn't be so difficult if her birthday wasn't in September.  But, it is.  And, the date for enrollment changes next year to September 1.  She will be 5 about a month after the cut off date for Kindergarten, which means they will enroll her in Transitional K.  The next year she will start K.  It boils down to public preschool for kids who turn 5 during the school year.  At least, that is how it has been portrayed.

So what if she has public preschool? What makes this difficult?  My munchkin didn't go to preschool, and everybody talks about how important it is.  What they don't get is that kids can acquire preschool skills at a really great day care.  My daughter is socialized, can write her name, identify shapes, letters and numbers, cut, paste, and perform most of the other tasks required for K.  I am greatly concerned she will not be challenged.  If she isn't challenged, she's bored.  Boredom leads to behavioral issues- even in young children.  Beyond that, who wants to be told that their child has to complete two years of Kindergarten because they're a month too young to have just one year.

What's a mom who's a teacher to do?  E-mail the principal of course.  I laid it out there for her.  How are the two years different?  What will you do to challenge my daughter who has acquired the skills?  Is it plausible that she could skip regular K if she is highly successful in TK? Then, depending on the answers, we apply for the school, or we wait an additional year and just start her in regular K.  It's frustrating though because we know our daughter is ready, but will be denied based on being 1 month too young.

Playground bully

We were at the mall playground last night, and I had the biggest shock of my life.  Because p

arenting is so hard, I don't often criticize other parents; however, today I am.

My daughter was playing with a boy a little older than her.  They were chasing each other and climbing just as expected.  They stop running for a minute and the boy who she's playing with suddenly turns and hits her in the neck- apparently on purpose.  She's fine.  Just as she recovers the boy turns and shoves her over.  It wasn't a gentle shove either.  I wish it were.

So, I comfort my daughter and scold the boy.  I ask where his parent is.  He doesn't identify her.  Apparently, she isn't there.  Another mom comes over to tell me that I'm overreacting.  I shouldn't bring my daughter to a public playground unless I expect that she is going to be hit and pushed over.  This is normal and perfectly acceptable.  I beg to differ and tell her that it isn't okay.

The little boy walks away and then comes back to tell me that I'm mean.  I respond that I'm not and that it isn't okay for him to hit and push other kids.

The first mom leaves, and REAL mom returns.  She apologizes profusely, tells me he has ADHD and is on medication, tells me she's trying, and then proceeds to start crying.  Yes, she started crying because I had a problem with something her kid did.  WOW!  I wasn't even being that harsh.  I thanked her for the apology, and told her that I understood it was hard.  I also noted that she had 3 children age 5 and under and looked like she was barely in her mid 20's.  She is clearly overwhelmed by whatever is happening in her life.

As I left the play area I realized something.   I felt so much worse for the boy because his mom used the fact that he has ADHD as an excuse for him.  She didn't scold him.  She didn't even attempt to give him a time out.  There was literally no consequence for his behavior.

Today, I realize I feel just as bad for the kids whose mom told me that it was to be expected.  Should I really expect that my daughter is going to be hit and pushed when she goes to a public playground?  Are you teaching your children that it's okay?  Wow.  I'd like to see what happens when they go to elementary school.

Parents, don't make excuses for your children!  Don't teach your kids that it's okay to hit other kids!  Be parents and teach them what is and isn't right.

Lesson for my daughter?  If other children are not going to play nice, you do not have to play with them.  You can play with the others.  You don't have to play with the kid who's going to hit you.

Birthday parties

When I was little, my parents didn't have birthday parties for us.  Don't get me wrong, they tried to make the day special, but there was never anything really FANTASTIC that screamed, "We're celebrating!"  There was dinner, cake, ice cream, and a present.  The first thing I can remember that remotely resembled a party didn't happen until I was 13, and even then all the guests were family and not my friends.

I always wanted the kind of party where you invite all your friends.  That's why my daughter has had a pretty big party each of her three years.   It's easy to throw her a party because everybody loves her.  And, she generally loves everybody right back.  We've done cupcake themed at a friend's house, princesses at a pizza place, and rainbow theme at a park.

This year, it's Doc McStuffins at home.

What are we planning?  Check-ups of course.  Tiny Beanie Baby patients and dollar store doctor kits.  Flower headbands like the one Doc wears will be available for all the girls in addition to the fun and games too.  "Put-the-Band-aid on the Boo-Boo" and Doc McStuffins Hopscotch will help keep them entertained.

I'm as excited as she is even though it's still a month and a half away.  Far fewer invitations will go out this year, but there will be plenty of fun to be had with the friends who have already said they plan on coming.

The Pilgrim

Several years ago on my trip to Ireland, I saw this statue.  He spoke to me.  He spoke to me so much that I had him painted in the wall in my study.  Again today, I find that this pilgrim at Clonmacnoise Monastery speaks to me.  

Life is often overwhelming.  There is a lot on my plate.  I am often tired and stressed out.  I miss spending time with my family: my brothers, niece and nephew, husband and daughter.  I even feel like burying my face in my hands and weeping sometimes.

At the same time, I know that life is a journey.  That journey sometimes throws many different things at us that we must juggle and cope with.  Yes, I am often tired, but there is nothing on my plate that I would let go of.