Saturday, February 27, 2010

Adventures in stupidity

So, my brothers and I are slowly dealing with my father's estate. We're sorting his belongings and trying to figure out his finances. On Thursday, I went to the bank to close his accounts, and my brother Adam came with me. Earlier in the day, Adam had gone to the bank to take care of his personal finances. While he was there, the bank manager recognized him and asked him for a copy of my father's death certificate. As he happened to have one, he gave it to her and they started chatting. During said conversation, Adam told the bank manager that we were going to let my father's house go into foreclosure. This is at the bank where my father has a home equity loan. Needless to say, they decided to take my dad's account and put it in a note until we go through probate. And, I'm sitting there looking like an idiot because my brother is stupid enough to tell a bank he doesn't intend to pay the mortgage on the house. Man was I pissed. I seriously almost left him at the bank to find his own way home.

That wasn't the end of it though. Yesterday, he called our brother Brian and asked him for a ride to the bank. He also tells Brian that he needs to go to the bank to make a payment on the loan because he doesn't want them to foreclose on the house yet. I can't begin to say how much this frustrates me. It's not like the foreclosure process only takes a day, a week, or a month. It takes a few months to get through this process. It's not like this is the only bank that has a claim to the house either. He's going to stave off one and ignore the other. And, the other has a MUCH greater claim.

The really stupid thing is that my dad was actually going to list Adam as the Executor of his estate.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

What else will I miss?


Last night, Jess was feeding our daughter and she took the spoon away from him and fed herself. Apparently he was going too slow and she was anxious for more of her sweet potatoes. She's never fed herself before. She's taken the spoon to play with it, but she's never actually taken it to feed herself. A bit later, she was chillin' in her bouncer and she sat up. Jess looks away, he looks back, and she's sitting up instead of reclining. Again, something she's never done. And, where was I? In the shower because I have a stupid schedule I have to keep if I want to drive to work in the morning. When my daughter was born I promised her I would be there for her. Her life would not pass us by without me being there. I know it doesn't seem like much, but I wonder what else I will miss. Her first steps? Her first day of school? Her dance recital or soccer game? I can't be that parent who misses their kid's life because they're too busy working.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Done being Wonder Woman!!

I can't remember who it was I was talking to, but somebody told me I needed to take my life back. So, that's what I've decided to do. I am done carrying the emotional burden. I am done being the mediator. I am done being a mommy to two grown men. I am done putting other people first. I am done being Wonder Woman. And, it feels good.


This weekend, I spent time with my hubby and daughter. I visited my grandparents. I went to Build-a-bear and the Cheesecake factory as part of our annual V-Day celebration. I went to my Weight Watchers meeting. I visited my brother and his wife and I got to meet my 3 week-old niece. I went shopping, went to church, and got a massage. And, I slept in.


Not once did I go to my father's house. Not once did I worry about the estate and how my brothers were going to get along. I didn't play the mediator or the responsible sibling. I decided it's time for them to take responsibility for their share. It's time for them to step up and grow up.

Wonder Woman feels rejuvenated. She feels like a better mom, sister, granddaughter, and wife. She feels strong, empowered, rested, and much happier. She feels like Wonder Woman again.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

What's the one thing Wonder Woman doesn't do?

Wonder Woman does it all. She takes care of her sick infant and her sick hubby. She gets the laundry done and still goes to work at a high school in South Central LA- 60+ miles from where she lives. She deals with her father's estate, a Paranoid Schizophrenic brother who has a paranoid Schizophrenic girlfriend, and a 35 year old brother who hasn't grown up yet. And, she's on her HOA board. She does all
this and still finds time for things like going to her friend's daughter's sweet 16 surprise party. And, she does it all while she's sick too. She is the best friend, sister, aunt, granddaughter, niece, cousin, mom, and wife you could ask for.


What's the one thing Wonder Woman doesn't do? She doesn't take care of
herself. Wonder Woman doesn't have the time to track points and go to WW
meetings. She doesn't have the time to go to the gym, cook healthy meals,
or even get 8 hours of sleep a night.



Wonder Woman is at her breaking point.
I think it's time for Wonder Woman to retire.
Or, is it possible for Wonder Woman to find the time to take care of
herself?